Erve, we were never ON aisle 5

Every day I seem to be getting older.

While this is probably no big surprise to you, I'm totally shocked.

While checking out at Kroger recently (without the children), I happily asked the cashier "How are you today?"

Polite teenager (who I'm sure has a fabulous mother) replied "Normally I ask that question, but I'm happy to be the one to respond. I'm good - how about you?"

I shared that I was great as I was shopping with no children - that normally when I shop, I feel like a bad clip from the movie "Mr. Mom" - "Erve, we were never ON aisle 5."

To which said teenager looked at me like I was from another planet.

Apparently he has not only never SEEN Mr. Mom - but doesn't even know it is a movie.




Really?

I am that old - old enough that people that drive to work no longer know about life when I learned to drive.

That got me thinking - of ten more reasons that prove that I am old.

10 - I not only care what my kids wear - but I care what other people's kids wear. Who lets their pre teen hang out at the mall unattended for countless hours wearing victoria's secrets as outer wear? Not only do I notice....but occasionally I even comment.

9 - I base ALL shopping decisions on comfort. Elastic waist pants....flip flops in multiple colors......jeans from the goodwill that someone else has already broken in for me. Gone are the days of fashion concerns (i'll admit it was a reach for me anyway)

8 - The last time I was in a bar all I could think about was the laundry I was going to have to do the next day. The smoke smell infiltrated my shoes, my purse, my clothes.....and everything in my suitcase that my shoes, my purse, my clothes had touched. I remember a time when I went to a bar to not have to think about anything - and when I am sure that laundry NEVER crossed my mind.

7 - I have children old enough to think I am old. When the kids were little, no one commented on my age. Just last week, Pumpkin told Bubbe "Bubbe - that book is old, REALLY old like when mom and dad were little. They didn't have color pictures or fancy pages back then."

6- I get excited when new furniture and appliances come into our home. A few weeks ago we got a "new to us" couch - I'm still ecstatic. I couldn't wait for the Sears appliance delivery man to show up with our new dishwasher a few years back. Like, paced around the house peeking out the windows. For a dishwasher. If your house had four kids under the age of 4 at the time drinking out of sippy cups and eating on curious george plates every half hour all day - you would miss the dishwasher too. However, grandpa from Sears - not the kind of guy I used to get excited about catching a glimpse of. Before I got old.

5 - TV shows that I like are on Nick at Night. And no one watches them. I think there is no better reference about parenting than Cosby. Just saying.

4 - People tell me I sound like their mother. I need a contract for tutoring for my teens to sign. Something to the effect of "I, _____, do promise to not get any zeros, show up to sessions with some facsimile of supplies, and never comment that my tutor sounds like my mother." I realize it doesn't help things when I begin a conversation with "you know, I understand where your mother is coming from." Then again, I'm old.

3 - It's 8:32 as I type and I am yawning. It is approaching my bedtime.

2 - Children I taught as sweet 6th graders are now grown up, college graduates who are married with classrooms of their own. (some are probably in prison - but one is definitely a grown up with her own classroom - so amazing!)

1 - I am always thinking. I am trying not to worry (will the children ever leave home? will we ever pay off the home that we want them to leave? will they love us enough to come visit some? and so on and so on), but my brain is always moving. I don't remember having a hard time sleeping as a college kid - in fact, quite the opposite....I slept whenever I could get away with it. But now, as a real grown up - I awake in the night, my brain switches on and I begin the discussion with myself about needing to go to sleep. Or in the midst of a movie, my mind wanders to the "to do" list of the day - did I actually do anything on it? Do we have milk for breakfast? did we show up everywhere we were supposed to today? Perhaps this is what they mean when they say "older and wiser" .......all this thinking might make me smarter???

And so, for those 10 reasons and many more - I am embracing old.

What a Ride!

Yesterday was a LONG day.

If you are a mother - you know exactly what I mean by LONG day. I don't have to define it, or share with you how nothing went as I thought it would, and what was supposed to be simple wasn't, or that children and husbands often complicate life.

Life with children is complicated.

Now, don't start bashing me. I know some of you mommy people are all alpha moms lovin the mom thing all day every day. We've met.

I, however, am a realistic.

One of my favorite movies of all time is Parenthood.

In BK (before kids) life, it was funny.

Now, the movie is part gospel, part "oh my goodness its happening to me" for me.

The wisest character (to no surprise) for me is Grandma. I have a feeling that me and grandma are going to be peas in a pod someday. Chick is SMART. But people think she is crazy.

Perhaps that is just wishful thinking on my part.

Wander back to 1989, with me - you don't have to find your parachute pants or jelly shoes (though I see that at least one of the two fashion trends is on its way back in):



I've got to confess.

Some days - I wake up and beg with God - "God today I need to ride the merry go round."

I don't wake up every day ready for the roller coaster that is life with kids (at least not the two that live in my house....).

Yet, I know that life with my two kids is always a roller coaster.

Case in point. Today we are busy at the dining room table cutting out pictures and creating a family tree. We are laughing. We are having a good time. We might be learning something. We are coloring - we are creative.

And then, as it always does the stuff hits the fan - there is green marker all over my table (I'm still calm - the table is old), the yelling begins "he colored on me" "nuh uh - she was like ramming her marker onto my side"......then the craziness is so loud no one can hear me - that is until my heads starts spinning around, and my inside voice is .....let's just say missing at the moment.

So - here's the question:

Is the good stuff the ride up? When you know you are about to fall? When your stomach is excited and nervous?

Or, is the good stuff the ride down? Let the fun begin as you rush around - waiting for the next climb?

I guess it probably doesn't matter - the good and the crazy with kids seems to be intertwined - like one is a necessary part for the other.

I am also guessing that because moments like the marker all over the table and massive sibling fighting happen, that I then appreciate and recognize the happy coloring and creativity as a good time.

Perhaps its too much to ask for a merry go round, but maybe some days we could hang on the kiddo coasters instead of riding The Scream Machine?